I regretted posting that pic.
It doesn't mean anything though.
U r just like her. both same. like father like daughter I guess?
but I'm your daughter too! but oh well, in that case,
definitely exclude me, I'm proudly to say that.
Because I ain't like you both,
when in good mood, u r nice,
when in bad mood, u r TERRIBLE HORRIBLE,
worst than a DEVIL.
I don't get you both seriously,
to YOU,
it is a case of bully,
not a sister figure at all,
whatever u say,
u r fucking mean,
I guess that's the reason why u have not find any boyfriend yet?
or maybe I should say because u don't have boyfriend that's why you r behaving like this?
pathetic.
U wanna say I'm being mean here,
well yes,
at least I don't say any fucking mean words to u,
like how u did to me
I take in all, only until I cannot take it.....whereby the limit actually quite high.
open the room door loudly and open the lights,
just to scold me for not putting the stuffs back,
oh I'm sorry, really,
because I totally forgot bout it,
but doesn't mean u have to be this mean!
u know what is case of bully?
THIS IS.
u know the feelings or not?
U WILL NEVER KNOW.
Imagine sleeping half way, suddenly frightened by all these,
its definitely worse than NIGHTMARE.
Is worse than u being disturbed by ghosts every night.
Eh maybe those ghost feelings u have are 'people' who trying to scare u on behalf of me? :)
poor girl.
I will respect another sis,
I will say thank you to her,
why?
Because she is being the best among u all,
despite the situation she is in now,
but she has the most IQ compare to u all,
even though she earn lesser money,
but to me,
I will definitely take care of her in the future even if I'm not capable of,
because she is the one I will say thank you to, to whatever she do, sincerely from my heart.
and to u,
why did u have such bad temper?
U don't understand....
U know I rmb a lot of things,
and if I still rmb things,
that because all those things leave scars in my heart.
U promised to give me reward in cash when I get 5As' above for my SPM
but I get watches from u,
who says I want watches?
I ask u why watches, its suppose to be cash
u angry,
u reply me back saying that 3 watches cost them how much,
but I seriously don't care,
whatever good grade AA...AAAA whatever it is,
how authentic they look,
do u think I can afford to wear Chanel watches?
Cost you more than 50k (authentic ones)?
You even think not to come for my graduation in US,
why can afford chanel watches? <-- u think people believe a?
and u think I wanna wear a? -.-
btw, all three of them are dead now, displaying there...
seriously,
give me cash, not watches,
besides, make up your promises,
I don't care u promise me when u're drunk or what,
its still a promise.
cry myself to sleep for 3 hours at least the day before,
eyes are so tired the next day I woke up, oh wait, not next day, is the same day cause I slept at 8am though.
Since young,
there's never a supportive family figures at home
only from friends.
I walk out of the house to pursue what I want,
you say I'm rebellious,
U know what is rebellious?
Tsk Tsk Tsk.
I always wanted my parents to take my report card,
to listen from teacher about how good their daughter is,
as the only daughter who study hard and get so many As,
I'm definitely proud of it,
but now, I guess I study on behalf of myself,
for the sake of my own future,
to earn my own fucking money,
to tell you all,
this is the child that u all forgotten off,
but hey guess what, she is now successful, with the help of all your "help" (money, and in-supportive characters)
to take report cards, but to u, u find it unnecessary,
"oh, what they will say? isnt it the same thing? these subjects are good these subjects are not, and good luck"?
ahhar ! u only go for a few ones, ur elder daughters but not mine,
how would u know?
U leave me alone the first day of primary school with sister who supposed to take care of me,
but she rather respect our uncle to take care of his son than me
leaving me alone,
when I'm actually so clingy,
when I'm actually so afraid,
but I have to pretend,
pretend not to cry like a kindergarten kid,
I hide my tears, and wipe them away,
pretend to be strong,
make friends by myself at the age of 7,
where are you all?
G O N E.
in my heart?
u all never stand a place in it.
U all give me a very bad childhood.
I really do not have a good childhood,
I do not have toys,
I do not ask for anything,
I don't know why.....guess I'm brought up that way,
not to ask for anything,
not to burden you all,
hey, seriously, I really think I'm a good child.
Even the Barbie doll, the only toy that belongs to mine,
I kept it till now,
because it means a lot when u remember to buy it for me
and oh, is sister ask me to tell you that,
if not I guess there wouldn't be any Barbie doll exist,
wouldn't be any toys that belongs to me,
and by that time, I shall declare I have no toys since young.
I really think I have a bad childhood,
thought the older the grow I will feel better,
but guess not.
Whenever I see toys,
I get really excited.....pathetic.
I never get respected by u.
or by u
U say why I have to celebrate friends' birthday,
U think is the same thing, every month celebrate each friend's birthday....
U don't know the meaning to it,
U don't know how people like me will feel to have people celebrate for me,
U don't know the feeling of being very blissful
that's why u do not have friends.
that's why u will tears when we celebrate your 50th birthday!
see?
pathetic.
To me,
I guess only friends are much important to me,
they know me better than u all do,
they don't judge.....they are there when I'm down.
Now what?
I have to be home by 12? for this one month time I CANNOT GO OUT?
LU SIAO A?!
-.-
I only have less than a month time to go out with friends,
because I really think,
the future is unpredictable,
I might come back, and might not.
Thinking bout the cold family here,
I rather be in US even though is a dead town, but at least I have friends, :)
thinking bout the freedom I have,
to expand my skills,
to be able to cook,
definitely not this house because everybody have OCD,
to learn a new dish or to bake,
is equals to doing some criminal stuffs....-.- WHY SO SERIOUS?
and you still want to say why your daughters never wanna help u all?
well, we are all BORN THIS WAY,
not to serve,
because even though I did,
I clean,
but you only remember the only time I did not clean one stuffs and never praise me for others,
you think I'm behaving like a kid who needs praising all the time,
but seriously,
that's the way. =)
reinforcement, I learn it in psychology class by the way....
aiya I'm lazy to check grammatical or any typo error,
I'm lazy like that,
because you all don't know how many sleepless nights I have and u can go ahead and tell people I love to sleep,
yea yea yea, true! really! I love to sleep, and I know you love to CURSE!
blablabla.
the tag is gona be "feelings" instead of "family", because family is supposed to be something happy but not like this.
Labels: feelings
Baby,top. || 12:26 PM
